Other Gambling Quotes
Rounders Quotes
If you are a fan of online casino games like http://sv.partycasino.com/ or Black Jack, then you are sure to enjoy the entertaining gambling quotes below. They are taken from the 1998 film Rounders, which sees two friends in a desperate attempt to win games of poker, to settle unpaid debts. If you have just played a few games, you may appreciate some of these funny lines. There are plenty of other genres, such as random funny quotes, relationship quotes and insensitive moving-on puns.
If you're too careful, your whole life can become a fuckin' grind.
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Fold or hang tough. Call or raise the bet. These are decisions you make at the table. Sometimes the odds are stacked so clear there's only one way to play it. Other times, like holding a small pair against two over cards, it's six to five, or even money, either way. Then it's all about feel, what's in your guts.
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Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker.
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You can't lose what you don't put in the middle... But you can't win much either.
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"Ya have it?" he asks me. "Sorry John, I don't remember." I got up and walked straight to the cashier. I sat with the best in the world, Knish, and I won.
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Worm: I guess the saying's true. In the poker game of life, women are the rake man. They are the fucking rake.
Mike McDermott: What the fuck are you talkin' about. What saying?
Worm: I... I don't know. There ought to be one though.
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It hurts doesn't it? Your hopes dashed, your dreams down the toilet. And your fate is sitting right besides you.
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We can't run from who we are. Our destiny chooses us.
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You play for a living, it's like any other job. You don't gamble, you grind it out. Your goal is to win one big bet an hour. That's it. Get your money in when you have the best of it, protect it when you don't. Don't give anything away.
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You were lookin' for that third three, but you forgot that Professor Green folded on Fourth Street and now you're representing that you have it. The DA made his two pair, but he knows they're no good. Judge Kaplan was trying to squeeze out a diamond flush but he came up short and Mr. Eisen is futilely hoping that his queens are going to stand up. So like I said, the Dean's bet is $20.
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Always leave yourself outs. Applies to a player's life away from the game same as it does at the table.
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Put a guy like me in a weak game like that, the cards themselves hardly matter. A fish acts strong- he's bluffing. Acts meek- he has a hand.
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[His girlfriend says they don't have time for sex right now.]
I'll be really quick. You won't feel a thing.
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Worm: She's really got him by the balls.
Petra: That's not so bad, is it?
Worm: It depends on the grip!
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Worm: You know what always cheers me up?
Mike McDermott: No, what's that?
Worm: Rolled up aces over kings. Check-raising stupid tourists and taking huge pots off of them. Playing all-night high-limit Hold'em at the Taj, "where the sand turns to gold." Stacks and towers of checks I can't even see over.
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Why does this still seem like gambling to you? I mean, why do you think the same five guys make it to the final table of the World Series of Poker EVERY SINGLE YEAR? What--are they the luckiest guys in Las Vegas?
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He beat me... Straight up... Pay him... Pay that man his money.
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All the luck inthe world isn't gonna change things for these guys. They're simply overmatched. We're not playing together, but we're not playing against each other, either. It's like the Nature Channel. You don't see piranhas eating each other, do you?
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I want him to think that I am pondering a call, but all I'm really thinkin' about it Vegas and the fuckin' Mirage.
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Worm: Remember when we found this place, man?
Mike: Yeah, I remember when we found thsi place, when you were hiding out from Tommy Manzy, 'cause you thought he was going to fucking pound you into an oblivion.
Worm: Yeah, now, see, what did I ever do to that guy?
Mike: You fucked his mother.
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The rule is this: you spot a man's tell, you don't say a fucking word.
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Generally, the rule is: the nicer the guy, the poorer the card player.
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Taki: What did you think he had? Does he look like a man beaten by jacks?
Zizzo: Jacks are a monster compared to the crap you've played!
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Mike McDermott: Uh, you know what? I got my five grand here. That's just fine by me. I'm going home.
Teddy KGB: Fine. It's a fucking joke anyway. After all, I am paying you with your money.
Mike McDermott: What did you say?
Teddy KGB: Your money... I am still up grand... from this last time I stick it in you.
Mike McDermott: [Narrating] They're trying to goad me, trying to own me. But this isn't a gunfight. It's not about pride or ego. It's only about money. I can leave now, even with Grama and KGB... and halfway to paying Petrovsky back. That's the safe play. I told Worm you can't lose what you don't put in the middle... But you can't win much either.
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It's immoral to let a sucker keep his money.
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Are you satisfied now, Teddy? Because I can keep busting you up all night if you like.
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In "Confessions of a Winning Poker Player," Jack King said, "Few players recall big pots they have won, strange as it seems, but every player can remember with remarkable accuracy the outstanding tough beats of his career." It seems true to me, 'cause walking in here, I can hardly remember how I built my bankroll, but I can't stop thinking of how I lost it.
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In my club, I will splash the pot whenever... [splashes pot] the fuck... [splashes pot] I please. [splashes pot]
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Nyet! Nyet! No More! No! Not tonight! This son of bitch, all night he, "Check. Check. Check." He trap me!
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Mike McDermott: That's 4,400. I'm gonna call you, or else I won't respect myself tomorrow morning.
Teddy KGB: Respect is all you have left in the morning.
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Mr. Son of a bitch, let's play some cards!
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Grama: Enough is enough, Teddy. Finish the fucking kid off.
Teddy KGB: Hanging around, hanging around. Kid's got alligator blood. Can't get rid of him.
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I've often seen these people, these squares at the table, short stack and long odds against them. All their outs gone. One last card in the deck that can help them. I used to wonder how they could let themselves get into such bad shape, and how the hell they thought they could turn it around.
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Mike: What happened?
Worm: Nothing, she closed her legs too fast!
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Amarillo Slim, the greatest proposition gambler of all time, held to his father's maxim: "You can shear a sheep many times, but skin him only once."
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Worm: Hey, I'm not gonna let a garbage can fall on my head.
Mike: No, you're gonna jump out of the way and let it land on me.
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Mike, I learned it from you. You always told me this was the rule. Rule number one: Throw away your cards the moment you know they can't win. Fold the fucking hand.
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Happens to everyone. Time to time, everyone goes bust. You'll be back in the game before you know it.
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Just like a young man, coming in for a quickie. I feel so unsatisfied...
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